He's four but he was a boring little shit for the first three years.

Mitch McConnell among top Republicans skipping Ruth Bader Ginsburg's memorial service at CapitolEulogizing rabbi credits late justice with ‘evening up the rights between women and men’ and ‘changing the course of law’

independent.co.uk

Looks Like the Windows XP Source Code Just Leaked on 4chanWould you believe more than 1% of computers worldwide are still using Windows XP? Incredibly, there are still millions of people using 19-year-old operating system. And a recent development — if it bears out — is another reason  people need to make the switch to something...

gizmodo.com.au

18 to 22-year-olds banned from gathering in Boulder, Colorado, after coronavirus surgeNearly 80 percent of recent coronavirus cases in the city were affiliated with students at the University of Colorado-Boulder.

nbcnews.com

'iPhone 12 mini' Name Appears in Leaked Apple iPhone 12 Case StickersEarlier this week a proven leaker claimed that the iPhone 12 lineup would be named 'iPhone 12 mini,' 'iPhone 12,' 'iPhone 12...

macrumors.com
A French breast scientist advises against wearing bras after a thorough study, thus tying for the best job ever and the best news ever.

A GOP rep said not gays nor NAMBLA can redefine marriage. Thankfully, nine fabulous people in robes can. ‪#suckit‬ ‪#nohomo‬ ‪#somehomo‬ ‪#yeshomo‬

Kit Kat has released a limited run of new flavors, including Sweet Corn, Espresso, and Kit Cat (with real Cat!).

Obama has budgeted $100million for NASA to lasso an asteroid- $99mill for rope and $1mill for the greatest cowboy hat of all time.

A Russian man attempted to win back his ex-wife with a homemade bomb. Here's an exclusive photo of the couple: ‪http://i.imgur.com/uuJTNmK.jpg

During a shooting, cops recommend going for the gunman, because nothing's scarier than being rushed by someone who just shit them self.

A third live poultry trading market has been shut down in China after six strange bird flu deaths. Personally, I think they're just chicken.

As a living human, you have a .00002% chance of being a billionaire. Jim Carrey reports: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zMRrNY0pxfM

Muslims are once again calling for the death of bloggers who blaspheme their religion of peace. "Jesus Christ that's stupid," said Muhammad.

An auction for a baseball card ended at $2.1million, meaning a fucking baseball card nearly joined the nation's wealthiest 1%.

Japan is now selling synthetic schoolgirl pee for only $27, severely undercutting the market for organic schoolgirl pee.

Scientists - "Being launched into a black hole would lead to a fiery death or spaghettification." Everyone else - "Sounds cool as FUCK."

An Italian couple in financial distress committed suicide. "Hopefully these tragic deaths trickle down to more poor people," said the rich.

A former Vice-Mayor in Tennessee gave dozens of women the classic "drive 90mph while masturbating out the window," which is a crime now?

Trayvon Martin's family settled their wrongful death suit for over $1mill. No word on how they'll spend the money, but likely not Skittles.

All based on real news from this week. See more @FridayUpdate on twitter.

Edit: removed link shorteners. Sorry!
The layers of my all handmade croissant

From: https://reddit.com/u/ShittyThoughts_

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